Why Diverse Friendships Make You More Alive
Human beings are social creatures, and our relationships shape the way we understand ourselves and the world. Both Carl Jung’s psychological framework and Catholic anthropology suggest that true human flourishing involves engaging with a broad range of perspectives, experiences, and personalities. From a Jungian perspective, diverse friendships help integrate the self by exposing us to aspects of our unconscious that we might otherwise neglect. Catholic anthropology, rooted in the belief that each person is made in the image of God, teaches that relationships with others allow us to encounter divine truth in new and profound ways. Together, these perspectives suggest that having diverse friends makes us more fully alive by expanding our self-awareness, strengthening our moral and spiritual growth, and deepening our participation in the broader human community.
Jungian Individuation and the Role of Diverse Relationships
Carl Jung’s theory of individuation describes the process by which an individual integrates different aspects of their personality, ultimately becoming a whole and authentic self. According to Jung, people often live in a limited frame of reference, shaped by their own dominant psychological type and personal experiences. However, encountering individuals with different temperaments, beliefs, and worldviews forces us to confront parts of ourselves that remain in the unconscious.
For example, a person who primarily identifies with rational thinking may resist or suppress emotions. By forming friendships with people who are more emotionally expressive, they may begin to recognize and integrate their own emotional life, leading to greater wholeness. Similarly, Jung’s concept of the shadow—the hidden, often unacknowledged aspects of the self—suggests that relationships with those different from us can serve as mirrors, revealing unconscious biases, fears, or unexplored potentials. Through dialogue, conflict, and mutual understanding, diverse friendships facilitate individuation by allowing us to encounter and integrate these hidden aspects of our psyche.
Catholic Anthropology and the Communal Nature of the Human Person
Catholic anthropology teaches that human beings are relational by nature because they are created in the image of a Trinitarian God—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—who exists in eternal relationship. This relational nature implies that human flourishing cannot occur in isolation but must happen within a network of relationships. The Catholic tradition also upholds the idea of solidarity, the recognition that all people are deeply interconnected, and that true growth comes from engaging with the breadth of human experience.
Jesus Himself modeled this in His ministry by forming relationships across social, ethnic, and religious boundaries. He dined with tax collectors and sinners, spoke with Samaritans, and welcomed Roman centurions. In doing so, He demonstrated that the path to holiness and full human flourishing is not through tribalism or exclusion, but through an openness to others—especially those who challenge our assumptions and call us to deeper conversion.
The Benefits of Having Diverse Friends
When we cultivate friendships with people who think, act, and believe differently from us, we are drawn out of ourselves and forced to encounter new dimensions of reality. This process is often uncomfortable, as it requires humility and a willingness to have our perspectives challenged. Yet, it is precisely this challenge that leads to growth.
Jungian psychology suggests that psychological well-being depends on a dynamic balance between opposites—between thinking and feeling, intuition and sensation, introversion and extroversion. Similarly, Catholic thought emphasizes the unity-in-diversity within the Body of Christ, where each person brings unique gifts to the whole. Just as the body requires different organs to function properly, a full and flourishing life requires relationships that stretch beyond our comfort zones.
Furthermore, diverse friendships help us develop virtues such as patience, empathy, and humility. Engaging with people of different backgrounds forces us to listen more attentively, consider perspectives beyond our own, and refine our own beliefs. This moral and intellectual development makes us more well-rounded individuals, capable of greater love and understanding.
Conclusion: How Diverse Friendships Make You More Fully Alive
Both Jungian psychology and Catholic anthropology affirm that diverse friendships make us more fully alive. From Jung’s perspective, they foster individuation by exposing us to unconscious aspects of ourselves and encouraging personal growth. From a Catholic perspective, they reflect the communal nature of human existence and our call to love and solidarity. In opening ourselves to diverse relationships, we do not lose our identity but rather expand it, becoming more integrated, more compassionate, and more attuned to the full spectrum of human experience. By embracing friendships with people who challenge and enrich us, we step more fully into the great adventure of being human, discovering in others the divine mystery that calls us to deeper life and love.
If you’re in the Calabasas, California area and seeking support, consider reaching out to Bill Moran, a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Life Coach specializing in Catholic counseling and therapy. You can call or text him at (805) 620-7572 or use the contact form
